arghhhh fck i just wrote a poeam and then fucking hit back and lost it fuck fuck fuck now i'm pissed off fuuuuck
 
she sees you when you look at him
and her gut twists and turns
she knows he sticks his cock inside you
and she just wants to bite it off
to put her fingers inside your wet and beautiful pussy
all these thought run through her head
making you moan as her tounge licks and flicks
maybe one day you'll see the truth
that jelousy has made her mad
she thinks of you as she touches herself
but ofcourse you won't ever see
so go stick his cock inside you pussy
and leave her alone in her room for a while
don't forget to turn off the light and shut the door



arghhhh thats the best i could do from memory....no where near as good as the first one...but tell me your thoughts please :) xoxoxoxox

I feel sad and lost...i don't know why.......i'm sick of being alone....i want things to go well with Katii i want us to get to know each other and for it to blossom in to something wonderful...but i am so used to things not going the way i want them too...i don't want anymore dissapointments in my life though *sigh*.....i just feel sad....i'm sick of feeling sad.....

i'm alive i'm alive i'm alive yep that's right......hmmmm well i'm not exatly that internet savvy i still have no idea how to put fancy pictures on here and such...or all those fancy links hmmm...........i don't really have a point but right now my feet are cold...i am in the middle of reading this really interesting book called Alyzon Whitestarr by Isobelle Carmody...it is really interesting you should check it out..she is also an Aussie authour ....i have a strong feeling that i am goig to fail school...but i don't feel that stressed about it...there are so many other avenues i can take....but still i guess it isnt a good thing...but my emotional state isnt really in a whole doing well at school sort of mode.....most people probably think this is some lame excuse...ohwell good for them....i guess they don't know what it feels like to be so upset that you can't even bring yourself to get up and go to school.....i dunno....i'm sick of sounding like some attention seeking blahblah person...if you know what i mean...i don';t mean to...... i don't know........i love animals my cat Tippi is so gorgeous and handsome i love him so much and my kitten Saphira (Saphhy) well what can i say about her she is so sweet and cute and snuggly lol..........I want a horse and a puppy dogg....wuff wuff......my dream was really weird last night...but it had friesian horses and border collies in ti which was good and some sweet old lady who for some reason i was related to haha..........i am so looking forward to the 16th when i get to meet Katii but i am so scared that it will go badly.....i shouldnt get my hopes up to high but i can't help it cause she is so gorgeous and we do have lot's in common and it would just be nice if i could finally meet someone and have well a proper relationship....cause i have never really had a proper relationship...sad hey....19 and never had a proper realtionship or sex.,...............hmmmm haha why am i always bearing my soul so openly.....it's going to get me into trouble one day i am sure.............oh and also.......i'm sorry i hardly ever reply to posts it's just i read them and they always seems so good and i can never think of anything remotly smart or helpful to say in reply to them...so i am not ignoring your posts and i do read them i promise! maybe one day i will get a stream of words that are just perfect to reply to them all in the meantime i shall read them and keep my unintelligent thoughts of them to myself haha :P love and all things fuzzy (expecially that fuzzy mould that you know cheese and bread gets on it) xoxoxoxoxoxox

I had the most wonderful dream last night i met Drew Barrymore and Regina Spektor! it was wonderful :D i wish it was true!!!!!

I like these Lyrics...By Death Cab for Cutie

"I Will Possess Your Heart"

How I wish you could see the potential,
the potential of you and me.
It's like a book elegantly bound but,
in a language that you can't read.
Just yet.

You gotta spend some time, Love.
You gotta spend some time with me.
And I know that you'll find, love
I will possess your heart.
You gotta spend some time, Love.
You gotta spend some time with me.
And I know that you'll find, love
I will possess your heart.

There are days when outside your window
I see my reflection as I slowly pass,
and I long for this mirrored perspective
when we'll be lovers, lovers at last.

You gotta spend some time, Love.
You gotta spend some time with me.
And I know that you'll find, love
I will possess your heart.
You gotta spend some time, Love.
You gotta spend some time with me.
And I know that you'll find, love
I will possess your heart.
I will possess your heart.
I will possess your heart.

You reject my... advances... and desperately...
I won't let you... let me down... so easily.
So easily.

You gotta spend some time, Love.
You gotta spend some time with me.
And I know that you'll find, love
I will possess your heart.
You gotta spend some time, Love.
You gotta spend some time with me.
And I know that you'll find, love
I will possess your heart.
You gotta spend some time, Love.
You gotta spend some time with me.
And I know that you'll find, love
I will possess your heart.
I will possess your heart.
I will possess your heart.


"Someday You Will Be Loved"

I once knew a girl
In the years of my youth
With eyes like the summer
All beauty and truth
In the morning I fled
Left a note and it read
Someday you will be loved.

I cannot pretend that I felt any regret
Cause each broken heart will eventually mend
As the blood runs red down the needle and thread
Someday you will be loved

You'll be loved you'll be loved
Like you never have known
The memories of me
Will seem more like bad dreams
Just a series of blurs
Like I never occurred
Someday you will be loved

You may feel alone when you're falling asleep
And everytime tears roll down your cheeks
But I know your heart belongs to someone you've yet to meet
Someday you will be loved

You'll be loved you'll be loved
Like you never have known
The memories of me
Will seem more like bad dreams
Just a series of blurs
Like I never occurred
Someday you will be loved

You'll be loved you'll be loved
Like you never have known
The memories of me
Will seem more like bad dreams
Just a series of blurs
Like I never occurred
Someday you will be loved
Someday you will be loved


"Title and registration"

The glove compartment is inaccurately named
And everybody knows it.
So i'm proposing a swift orderly change.

Cause behind its door there's nothing to keep my fingers warm
And all i find are souvenirs from better times
Before the gleam of your taillights fading east
To find yourself a better life.

I was searching for some legal document
As the rain beat down on the hood
When i stumbled upon pictures i tried to forget
And that's how this idea was drilled into my head

Cause it's too important
To stay the way it's been

There's no blame for how our love did slowly fade
And now that it's gone it's like it wasn't there at all
And here i rest where disappointment and regret collide
Lying awake at night

There's no blame for how our love did slowly fade
And now that it's gone it's like it wasn't there at all
And here i rest where disappointment and regret collide
Lying awake at night (up all night)
When i'm lying awake at night.

"All Is Full Of Love"

You'll be given love
You'll be taken care of
You'll be given love
You have to trust it,

Maybe not from the sources
you have poured yours
maybe not from the directions
you are staring at,

Twist your head around
it's all around you
all is full of love
all around you,

All is full of love
you just aint receiving
all is full of love
your phone is off the hook
all is full of love
your doors are all shut
all is full of love!

All is full of love
All is full of love
All is full of love
All is full of love
All is full of love




I'm tired and sick of worrying about the future.....so i think for a while i will get lost in music.....that is all.....much love xoxoxoxo

My stomach hurts so much....i can hardly walk :(.......i hate being female........and i hate feeling like crap........i swear men have no idea what our bodies have to go through....right now at this moment if i was granted one wish i would wish for every man to have to have periods just like woman............then they would stop being such cunts about it and would understand.......(excuse my french) ...............i went to my friends party last night it was reallly fun :) and i got to dress up like a fairy hehe :) my hair looked crazy i Teased it heaps!!..............My Cat and Kitten are so gosh damn cute!! they are awesome!! and snuggly and smudgy and so cooool! anyway this post doesnt really have much of a point and i don't know where it is going........so i'll stop now...give me lovings and such to make me feel better haha xoxoxox love love love oxoxoxoxoxo

 oh the lamesness of the poems i wrote when i was in love with Maddy.....i suppose it has its charms yes?

My faithful dragon Pyro,

Lands by my window sill,

Bright purple against the darkened sky.

He comes with news of a beautiful maiden.

He says she has eyes- the blue of forget me nots,

Hair as streaked as a rainbow,

A body of beauty,

Of curves,

And freckles.

Skin so smooth like a baby olive,

He says her voice is like that of a sweet love bird,

Everytime she speaks, it sounds just like a song.

He says he has never seen such a beautiful maiden.

She is smart,

Funny,

And Understands many things that others wouldn’t.

She is so imperfect,

Yet she is so right.

She is beautiful beyond your wildest imaginings,

So kind, and sweet,

Her heart is big, with so much love to give.

She is her, she is beauty itself.

I ask him of the fair maiden’s name.

Maddy he says.

Maddy is her name.

Maddy is a goddess.

-To be loved,

Maddy she is beauty itself.


haha i have worse.....maybe i will post them another time.....

 Miss Rosie who is atm the only person likely to read this......told me i should start using my livejournal cause apprantly it is good ahaha..so Hi Rosie and hi to anyone else who may happen to stumble across this (Rosie perhaps you could tell us the history of the word Stumble?) hehe......anywho....you know who i find rather facinating Virginia Woolf i have never really read much of her stuff but i find her life...and how she ended it incredibly interesting......my interest in her started when one of my teachers Andy started calling me Virginia and when i asked why he said i reminded him of Virginia Woolf....so i looked her up.......she was incredibly depressed and she commited suicide by filling her pockets with rocks and jumping into a river...........my facination with her reached a rather scary point last year when i was incredbly depressed and feeling rather suicidal i thought often of "doing a Virginia Woolf" and jumping into a river somewhere with rocks in my pockets....i think it's a good thing i got over wanting to do that yes? 
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virginia_Woolf

In her last note to her husband she wrote:

“

I feel certain that I am going mad again. I feel we can't go through another of those terrible times. And I shan't recover this time. I begin to hear voices, and I can't concentrate. So I am doing what seems the best thing to do. You have given me the greatest possible happiness. You have been in every way all that anyone could be. I don't think two people could have been happier 'til this terrible disease came. I can't fight any longer. I know that I am spoiling your life, that without me you could work. And you will I know. You see I can't even write this properly. I can't read. What I want to say is I owe all the happiness of my life to you. You have been entirely patient with me and incredibly good. I want to say that — everybody knows it. If anybody could have saved me it would have been you. Everything has gone from me but the certainty of your goodness. I can't go on spoiling your life any longer. I don't think two people could have been happier than we have been.

”

poor girl though...i wonder how many more great works she could have wrote if she hadn't killed herself...but then has anyone noticed that the best writers, poets, artists, actors  all seem to have had something wrong with them in their lives...sad eyyyy........well perhpas that mean i am destined to be a great actress just like i want to be haha :).............well that will do for now i suppose.........what a wonderfully uplifting journal for my first entry...not.......